Sunday, May 31, 2009

Asymptotal Emotions

I remember when I was first learning algebra. I was a punny little dork. So one day, thinking I was a clever little nerdette, I drew a picture like this for my dad:
And wrote: "I love you, asymptotally!" on the margin. I think my dad laughed, but being a robotics engineer, he was like, I don't think that's totally correct, my dear. To which I said, "I mean it's boundless. Don't you get it?" :)

Oh engineers and logicians. Ye of rigid definition.

Sometimes I feel like we box ourselves out of creatively experiencing the world. There is no formula or proof for faith. There is no conservation of love. I'd like to think of the Divine as limitless, stretching forever against the bounds of the universe in a infinite cosmic hug.

Some might say they don't believe there is a higher power, intervening on our behalf. I agree and disagree. I agree that there isn't some cosmic fairy, intervening to save us from our bad decisions or accidental tragedy. I think the Divine made us all with the ability to critically think, to express free will, to make choices. With this ability comes the bitter and the sweet. We have ultimate personal liberty, but that bears a level of responsibility. The way I see it, if there is Divine Intervention, it's less an invisible hand that keeps us from falling, and more like a very strong light. The light shines and shows us the truth of our existence. Sometimes we see the answers, sometimes we miss them because we close our eyes, and sometimes we intentionally ignore the signs.

In the end, we are only human. We are all in the midst of learning, stumbling, running and sometimes flying. To fuck things up is to be normal, and probably standard. It's when we're brave enough to stand up after we fall, brush ourselves off and reflect and learn - then we grow. And then comes the divine part. If we're lucky, if we muster compassion, then we forgive and move on. When we exist with total freedom from fear is when we express the essence of the Divine.

1 comment:

M@ said...

many of the philosophers and scientists today are rejecting the idea of free will. Ive always thought it as the realm of the religious. Love the illustrations